Talking to people

I have a girlfriend who doesn't want people to talk to her. She knows enough people, has enough friends and wants strangers to leave her alone and not engage her in conversation. Ok, that sounds harsh and cold and she really isn't that at all. But this was the gist of a discussion we were having the other day.

She gave a few examples of places she's been sitting and waiting and expecting alone/quiet time and complete strangers just start talking to her sometimes giving her way too much information. We were laughing at some of the "confessions" strangers made to her as she was just appalled.

Some in the group acknowledged that there were days they didn't want to talk to people, that we just wanted to be left alone. I didn't. I could only go as far as saying that there are days (I even think that's stretching it. I should probably say situations not days.) that I maybe won't initiate the conversation but most of the times I'll talk to the wall if no one is around. I said pretty much if you make eye contact with me you are fair game for commentary from me.

Point if fact, this morning was a perfect example.

20 dropped me off at the office (because he keeps the car) and before getting on the elevator I went to the courier drop box to leave a package. A man was heading towards the door I was exiting, I said good morning and he answered "humph". So I held the door for him and said, "Come on, its Friday, its a sunny beautiful day and someone is holding a door open for you. What's not good about it?" He just chuckled, mumbled a thanks and went inside. I dropped off my package and went back inside.

There was a woman waiting for the elevator. I don't know her but I know she works in the building because I have seen her from afar. She looked at me and smiled and I opened with a good morning and started asking her if she has heard anything about new stores coming to fill the empty commercial space that is on the main floor of the building. We chatted about it on the ride up on the elevator. Neither of us really knew anything and that's pretty much what we talked about.

When I got to the office I had to go back down to the coffee shop to buy coffee because we were all out. On my way there I talked to a woman in the mall area complimenting her blouse which was a gorgeous color of purple (my favorite), chatted with the woman in front of me in line who was trying to pick a pastry for breakfast; I talked her into a breakfast sandwich instead. The man behind me in line asked which coffee I was buying and so we talked about the different ones; we both like the bolder coffees. Another man 2 or 3 people in front of me made a comment about how the employees remember how to make all these different drink combinations. This comment tied into the fact that there was a trainee at the coffee bar and so I joined in saying that it got to tough and that drew us into a conversation with the girl training the trainee about the system of 'calling the drinks' in a specific way that tells them what to do. I continued chatting with this man while waiting for my coffee to be ground; he was on his way to the hospital to see a new grandson born last night. Its his 4th grandchild but the others are all girls. He's a widow and lives in his daughter's converted garage so that he can help out with the kids. He drives very little staying in the neighborhood but he loves to cook and so he does that for the family almost every day which he feels is how he helps her the most.

I was back in the office by 9:15 and I started thinking about talking to people. I think I can safely say that I will talk to just about anyone. Granted none of these people are going to be my new best friends, I good there but I can honestly say enjoy engaging with people.

Tomayto....tomaahto

I am still amazed every time I watch my kids go in opposite directions. You would think I would be used to it by now as they are turning 21 and 18 this year but I'm not. Last night waiting for the announcement from LeBron of where he's going this was the scenario.

20 (Mr. party all the time, be 'where it's at', don't I look great, status conscious, old soul, personally always broke yet theoretically fiscally conservative and socially liberal and amazingly traditional) was sitting at home glued to the TV and his state of the art Blackberry checking tweets and updates yet praying that he chooses to stay in Cleveland because this is Wade County and Wade's House.

17 (Mr. love to be the center of attention, cheapskate, no labels please, plain is great, young at heart & to the core, faithful, go with the flow, class clown, personally fiscally conservative and yet theoretically fiscally and socially liberal) was at a political rally for Rick Scott, a Republican gubernatorial candidate hoping and praying that the dream team be completed in Miami with the coming of The King. His last year's model (but bought this year on the cheap) Blackberry was in his pocket as he was huddled to a friend's iPhone to watch The Decision.

Moments before the announcement:
17 finds out the news because at his rally the Heat owner's attorney is there and he got a text from the owner saying 'he's coming' and it was announced at the rally to up roaring cheers BEFORE the announcement by LeBron on TV. 20 is getting confirmation of speculation that he must be coming because this announcement is 'on Cuban time'. LOL!

The Announcement:
20, head in his hands, is furiously tapping away and communicating with friends to confirm a party that was just waiting for the announcement to be over to get started as he mumbles to himself that he can't believe this at the same time giving props to Riley for getting it done. He's moving on not happy but consoles himself with the fact that more Heat games will now be on TV so he can see them more in NY while at school. 17 is making plans to attend the whatever is happening tomorrow at The Arena or wherever because he's going to be a part of this even if he can't get to a game because the tickets were sold out earlier in the morning not that he would have bought any because they were too expensive.

Later that evening:
20 is partying with friends at someone's house waiting for it to be late enough to go to the club in SOBE. 17 is LIVE on Channel 10 with his buddies jumping up and down screaming and yelling about LeBron in the parking lot of a local restaurant on a street corner in SW Miami where they pulled over because they saw a TV truck. He's spending the night at a friend's house so they can save time in the morning by not having to come pick him up to go downtown and 'be at the arena'.

The next morning:
17 is going to the arena not that they know if anything is happening or when but they are going to hang out there and see. They have their phones and will keep updated and go wherever the whatever is happening. He's hoping that they will give out free stuff and they can some. 20 is sleeping but will get up and go to the gym and then maybe the beach. He wants a Wade County t-shirt but wants me to buy it because he's broke.

These boys just crack me up. If we wouldn't have been at the births and had photographic proof that they are both ours and therefore brothers, you wouldn't know it. :)

Looking forward

I am ready for October! No, that's not a misprint and yes, I know it's only the end of June and I have no plans for the 4th of July but I am ready for October!

20 is starting his 3 year of college and as you may know we go to the homecoming game each year in October. He plans on playing quite a bit this year. You would think the team was only a handful of players and him and his buddies are the future stars.

So, I booked the hotel over a month ago with points that had been accumulated. I actually booked 2 rooms because my dad and my in-laws are coming with us. Since they were coming I then told my brother and he booked a room too so this may be quite some family reunion. So, the room is free all paid for with reward points.

Yesterday, we booked the airfare. Yes, I know its early but it was the last day of a sale and so I purchased 7 round trip tickets and we are all set to get there and sleep there. All we need now is a rental car and then we'll be set to get around while we're there. The car will be reserved as soon as we've accumulated enough reward points for that too. You see hubby is working on location and he estimates the points he's accumulating should cover the rental for October. How cool is that?!

Of course, I am also watching the points accumulated on the credit cards because those can be traded in for restaurant gift cards. How awesome would it be if we actually get enough points to cover a meal for all of us.

So, I may not have plans for the 4th of July but I'm ready for October! Oh yeah, I'm ready for Labor Day too because my brother is coming down with his family and we'll head to Orlando to see Mickey with niece. It will be her first trip there and we are all excited about it.
Talk about Doing what I like and liking what I do!

Look Up (a.k.a. Don't Look Down)

My house has been a busy busy hub of activity lately. Hubby is once again on a business trip and so I am with the boys trying to get everything done. All of the must do's and wanna do's plus the relax and enjoy stuff too.

So far I think I am doing pretty good. All the things that needed to get paid have been paid, I've attended all the family functions including an impromptu visit from my dad taking us to dinner for my bday and the washing is done and all the groceries and I even went to an exercise class (more on that later) and the pool is clean. The only thing that hasn't been done are the floors which brings me to the title of this post.

I'm thinking that its ok for a bit because we should be looking up and not down, right? Work with me people, looking down is always considered a bit depressing. You're down and out and told to chin up etc. If looking down doesn't bring you down then it most certainly will if you look down while visiting my home because the floors have not been cleaned everything else has and so something had to give. I actually had a bit of time and did the bathroom floors but didn't have time for the whole house because ya know it's a bigger area and takes a block of time that I just haven't had. Everything I have done has been in spurts with a little here and a little there until it all gets done.

I don't know how the floors are even going to get done because my calendar doesn't have any white space until Friday night and who the heck I ask you wants to spend their Friday night cleaning floors? Certainly, not I but I may have to because if I don't I may not only be able to look down but I may not be able to look at myself in the mirror. *sigh*

Time or Energy?

Wow, time flies when you're having fun. I have been busy and yet I have been finding time on my hands and still haven't been able to get things done. The list of things to do doesn't seem to shorten at all and I know I have been doing things.

I was having this conversation with my in-laws the other day about time. FIL was joking about when he worked full time and he had so much to do he could hardly get anything done and now he's semi-retired and still doesn't have time to do things. I argued that I think it has more to do with energy than time. There are days/weeks when I feel energized and I get more things done than I do in other months just because I seem to poop out and can't get to everything because I simply don't have the energy and need to rest and therefore find I don't have the time. He thought that had something to do with it but still thinks that time is the problem.

He also says that the more you have to do the more you get done. I do agree with that because I think you tend to organize yourself better and plan better to get it all done whereas when you only have a little to do then you feel you have all the time in the world to do it and postpone it and poof you run out of time to get it done or have to scramble at the last minute and complain you didn't have enough time to do it.

Whatever the real culprit is time or energy that's why I haven't posted lately. I will try to add more things to my list so I can organize myself better and blog more. Hmmm... that really doesn't even sound right, does it? *sigh*

I know one thing I have to do in the next couple of days is get into 20's room and clean it before he gets here and brings all his stuff home which could be any day now so that its all ready for him for the summer.

I obviously also need to figure out what's going on this Sunday for Father's Day and get ready for that. Those are the 2 big things on the horizon. There's lots of little stuff and I hope to get to some of that too. Crossing my fingers.

Book recommendation

I haven't been commenting much on books that I have been reading. I don't know why because I have been reading. Well, maybe not in the past month or so because I was focused on graduation and the scrapbooks I was making for my son but now I can get back to the regular pace of life.

Where do you get your book recommendations from? I get them from all over. I read the NY Times Sunday book review online and go through most of the previews they offer. I an a member of GoodReads which is a site to track what you read and share this info with friends. Not that I have been updating this but my friends have and so I see what they are reading. NPR reviews many books and I also get newsletters from Book List, Books and Books (a local indie store), and a few others. So, I get a lot of info about books aside from just talking to people about books.

This past weekend I got a book recommendation that I just couldn't turn down. While at my sister-in-laws I started perusing the Scholastic catalog that schools send home in grade school. My nephew, N8, saw me going over it and came to join me and I started pointing out to him that some of these books were some that I had read as a kid, I praised books like Charlotte's Web, series like Amelia Bedelia, Cam Jansen, and Nancy Drew. In that conversation we discussed some of Matt Christopher's works which he was familiar with and I introduced him to The Hardy Boys. Then he told me about The Diary of a Wimpy Kid series. He has read them and enjoyed them and highly recommends them. They are all EXCELLENT. We discussed what I had read about them and he explained why he liked them and then ran away. He returned with 3 books from the series to show me the illustrations and how it actually looks like a diary because the pages are lined. He then asked me if I wanted to borrow one. I looked at that face and although my brain was saying 'seriously?' I of course, said sure which is the first one, I should read that one. The pride on his face as he handed me the book was endearing. As he watched me I read the back cover. When I finished and started to put the book away in my purse he asked Doesn't it seem interesting? I assured him it did and told him it would be the next book I read.

And so, this weekend while we drive to St. Augustine I will be reading The Diary of a Wimpy Kid which although it says diary on the front cover is a journal. Do not be mistaken.

I can't wait to read it and talk to him about it. Too much fun.

All the same...

Everything is the same. I have been telling my kids this for years. If you learn how to stand in line and wait your turn for the slide in the playground then later you can stand in line at the grocery store. If you helped a teammate get up on a field of play then later you give a friend a ride to the airport. If you got stuck on a problem and asked the teacher a question then later you will ask for help. If you can translate a picture in your head to something on a piece of paper then later you can prepare presentations whether in a boardroom or the dinning room. If you had an idea and were encouraged to voice it then later you will be willing to offer new concepts in the workplace. If you sat quietly through a Sunday mass then later you can sit through a meeting or a presentation. It's all the same and for that reason it all matters.

I am convinced of this and I seriously doubt you could change my mind about it because each day that passes I see it more and more.

This weekend I had the pleasure of attending my nephew's (he's 13, we'll call him N13) piano recital. Because of timing restraints I was only able to go to one and not the other because they are now go to different teachers. There were going to be 11 performances. It was a small venue and all the students are truly talented.

My BIL was going to video the entire performance to later give copies to the other parents. He set up his tripod and camera coincidentally right next to where we were sitting as it was the best vantage point. My younger nephew (N8) was in the aisle seat and was warned to not kick, touch, bump etc the tripod. He also warned all of us sitting nearest that ANYthing we say will come out in the video to be gifted to all the parents.

The first student , she was maybe 8, went up and played from memory their solo. The woman sitting behind me whispered something to her neighbor, she opened the zipper on her purse removed and opened a pack of tissues. The rest of the students went up for their performances and she continued to whisper comments, removed water bottle from her purse which her neighbor had to open and made more noise than I could stand. In a short break where they had to change the piano bench for someone, I turned and reminded the woman that everything was being recorded right next to her. She just smiled at me. She was perfectly quiet when her grandson performed but not the others.

Later BIL joked with me and thanked me for making the comment because he felt awkward doing so since this person was related to him and N8 commented to me that he behaved better than she did. He hoped she'd be more respectful at his recital and wondered if she does all that at Mass. From the mouths of babes....

It's all the same people and it matters.

To....From....

Through the years when I have given pictures of my kids to people I write something on the back; a dedication of sorts. If I am really pressed for time I at a minimum write the date of the event of the picture and the pictured person's name on the back. Does everyone do this? I don't know. Why do I do this? I have a few reasons.
First, because that's what my momma taught me. She always had me sign the back of the picture I was giving to grandparents or aunts etc. I never asked why. Being the obedient (stop laughing!) child that I was I simply did as I was told.
Second, I have seen this on odd pictures I have come across over the years when sorting through things after my mother and grandmother passed away. The picture may say 'To my favorite Aunt from cookie' with the date or at least a year on it and then we are able to figure out who the baby is.
Third, because the pictures that have been passed down to me by previous generations that don't have anything on the back to indicate the who, why, where, or what of the picture has sometimes been unidentifiable by us who are still here trying to figure out what this is a picture of.

So, in conclusion, at a minimum I write the name and date on the back.

Now that you know all that, I can tell you this story.
As my boys are now both high school graduates and I theoretically adult men beginning their individual paths in this world, I thought it was the appropriate time for them to dedicate the pictures themselves. They are big boys and as evidenced by the diplomas they were given know who to choose words and string them together coherently and write them all by themselves. Well, let me tell you something. You would have thought that I asked for a 57 page MLA-style thesis. I pulled out the pictures with a week advance notice and told him who they were for. Nothing outrageous here just grandparents, godparents and aunt and uncle. After reminding him and being asked what to write for the umpteenth time. I said just at least put 'For my grandparents, love 17' with the date. Don't make this harder than it is, it's very simple.

I still have 2 pictures that were not handed out at our graduation lunch celebration this past weekend because he couldn't bring himself to even write his name on them. But I did notice that he gave some wallet size photos to a couple of people. So, I asked last night who he gave pictures to on Saturday. He told me 3 friends of mine. Granted, if they are friends of mine they are friends of his but what I mean is he gave pictures to 3 of my girlfriends. So, I continued to probe and was told that he thought it was nice to give them something because they were a big part of his life and a big reason he's the man he is. Yes, I got teary-eyed. But I'm still his mom so I asked if he just randomly handed them the photo and he told me that he wrote something on the back of each one. He tells me it was 'just a little thing so they would know how important they are'. And here I was all upset because the boy can't write to my godparents with love, 17. It seems the boy can write when he wants. I have no idea what he wrote on the photo for my 3 girlfriends but I know that they are probably just as touched as I am knowing that he felt they were a significant part of his life that he wanted to acknowledge them in that way.
I guess I will put the date and his name on the other 2 and hand them out at the next family gathering because really those are from me not him.

Cool Quote

"Graduation is only a concept. In real life every day you graduate. Graduation is a process that goes on until the last day of your life. If you can grasp that, you'll make a difference."

- Arie Pencovici

I don't know who this Pencovici is. I tried searching him online and didn't find much other than this and a couple of other quotes but I truly like the sentiment in this particular quote. Of course, tomorrow 17 graduates from high school and I am in the mood for this type of thing.

One of my gifts to him is a book of quotes. I didn't buy it. I made it. Well, I made it in the sense that I bought a blank book and have spent the past year jotting down quotes that I liked. The thing is even he contributed a few quotes that he came across and liked. He knew I was collecting quotes I always have. It's something I have liked since I was a kid. When I graduated from high school my mother gave me a book similar to the one I did for 17. The fun part is that he gave me some quotes for the book and he doesn't know that its for him. He thinks its just something I was doing for me.

So, tomorrow will be a mixed emotion day. One of those that days that will be all good but emotionally draining even though its a happy occasion. I'm sure there will be more written about this later.

Gifts & Moms

This past weekend was Mother's Day. I read the best article about what a mom really wants here in our local paper.
I think that article hit the nail on the head, at least for me. I don't need you to rack your head trying to find a gift that will fit your budget. I just need to know you are living a good life. This year I got a some really good stuff.

17 bought me a Harry Connick Jr CD. It meant that he was listening and paying attention when I was giving my undivided attention to AI this past week when he was the shows mentor for the singers. I love his voice. It was very thoughtful. In addition to that he gave me the go ahead to register him (and pay for-duh!) his college orientation. Why is that a gift because it's a decision. He has been waffling for the past 2 months and he finally decided. I was thrilled with both of his gifts.

20 is away at school and so he couldn't spend the day with us and the extended family. First, he sent me a text. "Hey, mom ru up? Happy Mother's Day!" It was 11am- the middle of the morning, of course I was up. I was getting ready to head out the door for the day's activities but he's in college and still sleeps in - a nice luxury most of us don't have anymore. Once I assured him I was up he called and we chatted for about 1/2 an hour. In that conversation he gave me what I think was the real gift (other than an uninterrupted and unrushed conversation). First he made sure that I was sitting down and then he told me that it was official he had declared his major as Political Science. I was so happy and excited that he had finally picked something. Then in true mother form I started inquiring about a second major or a minor perhaps. I could hear him roll his eyes through the phone lines as he said ma, please. But we'll see. I'll keep watering that seed and see if anything pops out. Later in the day he sent me a picture via text of a bunch of mixed flowers that said what I wanted to send you but I'm a broke college student. I told him they were lovely and would last longer this way.

Later as I reflected on the day I felt all warm and fuzzy inside because what they gave me was signs that they are doing what they need to do, taking control of the next steps in their lives and making progress. It felt good and made me smile. Of course, the smile was bittersweet as the first person I wanted to share this all with was my mom and I couldn't the way I wanted to. I did walk over to a picture of us that I have and say out loud to it (her) they're doing good, huh? And I know she was smiling down on us as I was smiling at her.

A/C CPR

Does anyone know how to perform CPR on a air conditioning unit? All I know how to do is turn it off and on and that's not working. ;)

The only room that still has a ceiling fan is 20s. Guess where I'm sleeping? I borrowed a couple of desk top fans from a friend and now the 3 of us each have one to take around the house and use as we like.

I'm waiting for the repairman to come this afternoon. I hope it's something simple. Actually, more than that I hope its something cheap because I need my air conditioning. This is NOT a luxury.

Smile

I was at the flower shop the other day ordering some flowers for a prom date of 17s and I picked up a bunch of purple tulips for moi for no reason other than they were pretty. They are beautiful. Its a small bunch, only 6 flowers. They are in a small vase at the entrance of the house. When they open up they have yellow inside which just looks fabulous.
Every single time I see them I smile. They are just so pretty to look at. I absolutely love the color of the deep purple and I love the clean lines of the tulip stem and flower. Such an easy and simple way to make me smile over and over and over again.
Thanks me!

Yaaaawwwwnnnnn!

It is said that you burn less than a calorie when you yawn. (Yes, I looked it up.) Based on how much I have been yawning today I can probably eat an entire pint of Haagen Daas pistachio ice cream.

That would be my way of saying I am really tired today for some reason and I can't even think of anything to blog about.

While typing the above 4 sentences I actually yawned 3 times. So, there ya go!

Spring Cleaning sort of

I cleaned out my closet this weekend. Well, that's not entirely true. I took out all the clothes, sorted through it, separated a few things for donation because even if it fit me I just didn't want to wear it anymore. I sorted the remaining items and out it all back in.

I sorted it first by size. I have clothes in 4 different sizes. Then within the size I sorted summer and winter which a very subtle distinction for most of my clothes here in Miami.

Any other year this project is undertaken I would have gotten rid of anything that didn't fit. But its different now. I am actually loosing weight. Three weeks ago I started taking a prescribed appetite suppressant and its working. So, theoretically, all of the doesn't fit clothes should fit eventually. And since its sorted by size it will be easy to find something to wear as I loose weight and presumably get rid of the larger size items. At least that's the plan right now but life's a moving target so I tend to write these things in sand not concrete.

Now, I said that I have 4 sizes which is technically true but the smallest size item is kept merely for sentimental reasons and truly I never expect to fit into again. So, I really only have wardrobe in 3 sizes. Now, we need to understand that wearing most of these items will depend on loosing the weight evenly top and bottom. LOL! And I have as of yet to start doing any exercising that would help in any way. I am toying with some local classes of Tai Chi and Zoomba. I am still looking into it and haven't committed to anything. We'll see how this goes.

This week the family is getting a cantina (pre-ordered food from a local cuban restaurant) so that I don't have to cook. I will tell you its not that its hard to cook for them and not eat it because the pills are doing their job and I'm not hungry but its ticking me off. I make all this food and then I can't enjoy it because I take a couple of bites and I'm full. I acknowledge that in that state of mind I am not the most pleasant person to be around. And so this week we are going to try to minimize that by pre-ordering the food for family-sanity sake.

Today is...

Thursday. Today is Thursday. Today is Thursday.

We all get a little confused sometimes and think it's one day when it's really another because some days just feel like a Tuesday and others feel like a Friday. I know this is not unique to me. The problem here is I have been doing it ALL week.

Monday I thought it was Tuesday. So much so that when I was going to the car in the morning I headed towards the curb to put the garbage can away as pick up is on Mon & Thurs. I was grabbing it when I realized that all the neighbors had their cans out because DUH, it was Monday. It didn't stop there.

Tuesday evening my son and I were discussing plans for the week, specifically Wednesday. I was asking him if he wanted me to leave his dinner in the microwave or in the fridge on Wednesday because was probably going to be out when he got home. He paused and looked me in the eye and said mom, you realize that's tomorrow. I said no, I'm talking about Wednesday. He laughed and asked me what day it was and I with a straight face told him Monday. He teased me about it all night because he thought I was joking.

The only day I knew what day it was was on Wednesday. I knew ALL day that it was Wednesday . It was a very long day. It probably had something to do with the fact that in my head I had started this week twice already.

Today I sent some emails to a girlfriend and my SIL to firm up some plans for the weekend. I ended both emails with TGIF! They each answered my emails and I continued on with my workday. Until a client called to tell me that she needed something and could I get it to her today because she wasn't going to be there tomorrow. I said sure! I won't be here either -because in my world it's Friday and I don't work on Saturday- she then commented on how great it was to have a 3-day weekend and I was confused because as far as I know there's no Monday holiday in April. I swear we sounded like an Abbot and Costello bit until I looked at the calendar and realized that today was, I mean IS Thursday. After laughing hysterically with my client, I emailed GF and SIL calling them both out on not correcting me. They were both very PC as they told me that they hadn't noticed. Of course, had it been the other way around I probably would have told them they were complete bubble heads but they are nice that way.

I still have another day to get through before this is all over. OMG, this is the longest week EVER!

Today is Thursday, today is Thursday.

Good-Bye

This was a rough weekend for me. I did a lot of things that I won't get into now (maybe later) but the hardest thing I did this weekend was say good-bye to our family pet; our Golden Retriever, Max.

We got Max as a puppy almost 13 years ago. He ate his fair share of our belongings as a puppy and made us chase him around the neighborhood when he would run out the front door or side gate. The boys would get pulled down the block as you wondered who was walking who. Then he was old enough to live mostly outside.

A few years back he got a cyst behind his left shoulder and we had it removed. It was benign. Since then he had others and we basically ignored them as they didn't seem to bother him and the costs of removal were prohibitive. In the past year and a half. He got more of them and some of them he scratched and they burst and without getting into details I will tell you it was not easy to care for and try to heal on our own but we did. We were successful two separate times. Then another one came out in the same spot as the original and he was very fussy about it. Some days he let me clean it, others he didn't. I did what I could when he let me. Then last week I felt one in his throat.

After many phone calls, I found vet that would see him and only charge me if a procedure was done. I took him on Saturday afternoon. Without doing a biopsy we don't know if they were malignant or not but he did tell me that the one in his throat was going to obstruct his eating and swallowing. I had already noticed he wasn't eating normally and he's been 'coughing' or sort of 'clearing his throat' often apparently as a direct result of this latest cyst. His honest suggestion was to either have them surgically removed (costing more than I paid for my kids private schooling) or put him to sleep so that he not suffer. It broke my heart but I had to choose the later.

I then took him to the county facility to surrender him. It broke my heart to leave him there. I drove home in tears and had a lonely weekend without him. Throughout the rest of the weekend I would talk to him and he didn't answer and I'd realize all over again he wasn't there. I got up this morning as usual to let him out and it all hit me again. I miss him tremendously and I am so sorry I could not afford the healthcare he needed.

Pretty in Pink

Have you ever bought something you will never wear or use? I don't mean have you bought something and then never worn it or used it. I mean when you were buying it you were thinking I don't think I will actually wear this but I want to wear it and so you buy it in the hopes that maybe you will. Please tell me I'm not the only one who has done this. Oh well, whatever. I did it.

I went shopping with a girlfriend for clothes. Let me start by stating that I don't normally do this. I hate clothes shopping because I am overweight and I get very frustrated which only makes me want to go home and do something I am good at - eating. You see the problem here.

So, GF and I went shopping because she has lost a ton of weight and needed new clothes desperately. I went for moral support I guess, I'm not sure. Anyway, she did very well buying some nice things that all fit her fabulously.

I started rummaging through the sale rack to see what I see. I had no intention of buying anything when I walked in with her but you never know what kind of a deal you can find if you don't look. Then I started thinking I do have my son's graduation coming up, I could get something for that. Actually, I should get something for that otherwise I am in danger of wearing the same thing I wore to the last graduation. I pulled out a few blouses (4) and went to try them on. No deal. One was too tight, constricting the girls, another too tight in the arms, and the others were just too clingy and showed way too many bulges. I went back out and kept looking. I tried on 3 more. Nothing. Then I was going through the rack with GF and the fabulous salesgirl that was helping us. No, I am NOT being sarcastic. She was totally awesome. She searched and found and suggested and explained and brought and took all kinds of things. She was great. I pull out a few more tops and GF finds this pink one. It's my size. It's even my style but it's really pink. I'm not talking pastel baby pink. I am talking they can probably locate me from the Space Station if I stand outside bright pink. I tried it on. It fit. Nice. I looked at myself in the mirror from all angles. I wasn't sure about it. GF saw it. She liked it on me said it was a beautiful blouse. It is but I don't know. I hold on to it and go look around again. I find another one that's sheer and gray tones. I try it on. It doesn't go down past my hips and has a belt which I won't wear and if I pull it up I can flip it so that the bottom pillows over and it doesn't look like a straight blouse anymore. It works.

Now I am walking around with these 2 blouses. One that fits if I wear it this way and the other one that is bright bright pink. Let it be known that once upon a time I wore all kinds of colors everyday to anywhere but that was before not now.

I bought both blouses. I hung the gray one up in the closet because I think that's the one I will wear fro graduation. Maybe. The pink one is hanging on the knob of my armoire. So I can see it and get used to it. When I look at it I can hear it saying, I am totally you - please wear me. But I don't know. Maybe I'll let it hang there like an art piece. A new decoration for my room. It's really bright and cheery.

5 weeks!

I just finished telling you that April was nice and easy. I get home last night and do the required home things, the cooking and the picking up and sit to quietly make the birthday cards. I don't actually make the birthday cards because I get sidetracked with sorting and organizing scrap stuff that has been purchased and ordered and received and generally not put away. As I am calmly doing that my mind wanders to the multitude of projects I have going. That's when it hits me. 17 is graduating VERY soon. I stop everything and go look at a calendar. I have only 5 weekends and 2 SIS nights to do whatever I am going to do for this child's graduation. OMG! How did this get here so fast?

Much planning, much organizing needs to get done here and fast.

April

Here we go it's April. Tonight I will make the birthday cards for the month and pull out the supplies for the gift making for this month. There isn't took much going on this month other than getting ready for May really. Actually what I will be doing the most of is picking people up and dropping them off at airports and seaports. It seems everyone is coming and going. I have already taken hubby to the airport today. On Saturday I pick up SIL and family from the seaport. Then I will hopefully be picking up hubby from the airport and the following week MIL from the airport.

Easter didn't require any making of anything because all of the small ones were away on vacations. The youngest child at the small family gathering was 17. And although some coaxed and teased to go hide in another room while we hid eggs, he didn't budge. There was no hunt this Easter. It was still nice.

Hubby who was here for the weekend headed back to NY for another 10 days. At least that's the plan but we already know that's a moving target so we will have to wait and see. I did send him back with a Thank You card for the folks at the deli he eats at (with the exception of his birthday) for indulging me with his birthday cupcakes.

May will be a busy month as 17 is graduating. There will be awards ceremonies, graduation mass, and the big day itself, and the party that we must have to celebrate the milestone. To that end I have to finish up his scrapbook. So, I will be doing lots of that in the days to come. I really want to get it all done. So, I will be organizing those things this evening as well.

I see an evening of planning and scheduling to make sure its all done it time.

...No luck at all

My mother had a saying, "If it wasn't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all." There is much evidence in my life stories supporting the notion I inherited this trait. Here's one. Enjoy!

I love celebrations. I love parties. I love a good time. Anything can become something to celebrate. So, obviously, birthdays are well worth celebrating in my book. It doesn't matter the #, they are all occasions to be marked as fait acompli! we made it another year! hooray!

I married Mr. Opposite of me (in many ways) especially in the celebrate birthdays arena. He does NOT like celebrating his birthday because he does NOT like the idea of getting old. Even more so than most people. Whatever. I was not happy with the idea that he would be by himself on his birthday with no one in NY to make a fuss for his birthday. The fact that he was probably thrilled with this prospect was of no interest to me.

I set out on a mission to have a favorite dessert secretly delivered to him. After running into difficulties at the hotel getting assistance in this endeavor I resorted to Plan B. The entire time during his stay there he has repeatedly told me of a deli he had lunch at daily. Hubby is nothing if not consistent. Over various conversations, I gleaned that it's across the street from their job site, he went every day with his co-worker who always got the soup of the day, the waitresses already knew them by name and one of them was named Anne. So, how many deli's could there be in this small town where they were working? I googled it and came up with 4 in the general vicinity of where the site was. I wasn't taking him literally when he said across the street (I should have) and I started calling until on the 3rd call I found the one with a waitress named Anne. She got on the phone and we were able to confirm the 2 men did go there every day and which one hubby was. I tell her his birthday is coming up and I wanted to do something special. She put me on with the owner. He didn't know quite what we could get for him because according to the owner hubby doesn't eat much (understatement of the year- if you look up picky eater in the dictionary, its a picture of him). We got a laugh when from Miami I was able to tell him the main meals that he orders over and over, I even got the condiments and the sides right. So, back to dessert. We settled on 4 over sized red velvet cake cupcakes that were also the owners favorites and he assured me they were aMAYZing. I tell him if they want to take a picture, sing him Happy Birthday whatever, they want to embarrass him a little. He assures me that " (they'll) do him good." Perfect.
I tell a few people about it here and of course there were the naysayers predicting he wouldn't eat there that day. Naysayer #1 being our son, 17. Whatever.
I try to get a hold of the co-worker but as I don't have his # because everyone just uses cell phones. The other drawback was I only knew his 1st name, no last name. So I start with the hotel. I called his room on 3 separate occasions, he wasn't there. I call the work office in the city he's originally from and actually make it as far as the division he works in. I tried to get to a secretary or close co-worker to get his cell # but had to leave a message which probably never got delivered and I never got a call back.
So, Bday get here. It's 12:45. I know he goes to lunch 12ish (consistent, remember) so I figure he'll get the cupcakes soon. I call to wish him a happy birthday and he tells me he just got back from lunch. I tell him I was glad I didn't interrupt work and wait...nothing. I think, SOB! he didn't eat there. So, I ask and he tells me all about going to ANOTHER deli that we had gone to when we were up there last year. I started laughing. So, you didn't go across the street. And he actually boasts - in the 2 months I've been here this is only the 3rd time I've been someplace else. I'm still laughing.
Me: Great, babe. Now I need you to go across the street and have dessert.
Him: Huh?
Me: You heard me, go across the street. Thank Anne and Ronnie and have dessert.
Him: What did you do?
Me: Never you mind. Just go.
Him: By myself?
Me: No, take whoever you had lunch with
Him: Ok, - hey co-worker, don't sit down!- I'll call you back.

MIL calls me and asks how the surprise went. I tell her the story and she starts laughing hysterically. So, did he go? He's there now I tell her.

He calls me back. The cupcakes were AMAZING!
At least there's that.