Where would you be?

Do you have problems finding things? I realize I am not the most organized person in the world nor is my house the most organized in the world (or Miami, for that matter). There is no place for every thing yadda yadda. But there are general locations for things. I mean there's a junk drawer for writing instruments, coupons, menus, scissors etc. But most of the time when you look for the scissors (we have 3) they aren't there. There are 3 drawers for kitchen utensils of all sorts and one of those counter top tool turnabouts. I look in all 4 places before I have to start the deep breathing to remain calm.

Lately, I find myself asking things out loud to the house and I wait to see if it answers. Like, "If you were a can opener where would you be?" I ask because naturally, it's not were it was supposed to be. Most times there is no answer and I have to keep fishing around and banging until someone asks if I am ok. No, I am not ok, I can't finish doing what I'm doing not because we don't HAVE something but because I can't FIND it! (taking a deep cleansing breath) The other day, after we did the groceries, I couldn't find the brand new bottle of maple syrup I KNOW I bought. So, I asked the house, "If you were a bottle of syrup, where would you be?" Hubby actually answered, "In the fridge!" WOW! I was shocked. SO , I kept it going. I couldn't find a take-out menu we use so often I should have the number memorized but I don't and so I asked, "If you were the XXX Menu, where would you be?" and a child answered, "on the side counter." I almost fell over in shock. Of course, it didn't work, when I asked, "If you were a whisk, where would you be?" What I got in return was, "What's a whisk?" I had to laugh. Gimme patience!