I left home when I was 18 and when I was 22 my mother passed away. Since we had lived apart, her in VA and me in FL for years, I was used to her not being right there all the time. But people always commented to me how I would call in an instant to tell her about something, and that was before cell phones. They would say "but that's long distance!" but it didn't matter to me or her. When I was short on cash, I'd even call collect, she never thought it was an emergency, she new it was just whatever.
It took me years to get over that. There were many times when I would pick up the phone to dial her number and then realize that she's not there. I still make the mental calls and talk to her on a regular basis. I act like she's still there and I wholeheartedly believe that she IS around. Naturally, I miss our conversations and sharing my children with her. She always looked forward to being a grandma. Many times I can play both sides of the conversation in my head. Maybe all this sounds nuts but it's working for me.
Today is the 20th Anniversary of her passing. Love ya mom! Wish you were here.