Friday, August 17, 2007

17 and still needs his mommy

I have always been told that I'm tough on my kids. Maybe I am but as we all know they didn't come with directions so like most I'm winging this parenthood and raising kids thing. Every age has its blessed moments and its I'm going to pull every hair out of my head moments. And I mean every age.

There's a saying in Spanish that my mother-in-law always says, "esta en la edad de la peseta" which I can't really translate. I guess it means something like "he's at that bothersome age". Anyway, she's been telling me that since 17 was 17 MONTHS old and now he's 17 YEARS old. So, when does it end. Technically, in a few months (November) he will 18 and as far as society rules go, I'm done. He's an adult. Now, 17 is a wonderful person I don't want this to come across like he's the devil incarnate. But he knows how to push the envelope (don't wonder, he got that from me). He's more anal retentive than I am but he knows how to have a good time too. But he's an all or nothing kind of person. There's no middle ground. He is going to do things HIS way. This was apparent when early on he decided that the proper way to get around was to crawl backwards (we tried to no avail to make him go forwards). He was lighting quick but backwards. We used to laugh then and say that I hope this isn't a sign of things to come otherwise he'll have a hard life. I can safely say that he doesn't do things backwards anymore but he does many times choose the hard way.

We tend to fight a lot. He and I lock horns because we are much a like. He is me. It's tiring arguing and fighting with 'yourself' for 17 years. I'm tired. Over this summer as he prepared to start his Senior year and apply to college and move into another phase of his life we have continued to lock horns. At one point I was frustrated and sat down with him and asked if he wanted me to back off. I mean really, I was tired of pushing and ya know it's his life. Well, being the smarty that he is he said yes, just back off, I'll do it in my time. Fine. fine. FINE. We each went our merry way and I was having a more pleasant summer- less stressful. Then like a week later he tells me "Hey mom, remember when we agreed that you should back off?" Yes, I tell him, the voice inside my head thinking he's going to tell me he did the essays, filled out the applications and they are about ready to mail in, getting all excited and jumping up and down in my head. "well, I think you need to push again." Thud! goes the little me that was jumping in my head. Why, I ask. "Well, I think I need the reminding, I will probably do it in my own time anyway but I need you to push and remind me. You're good at that." Well, at least we know I'm good for something. I'm good at *itching and moaning and nagging and being ignored. Fabulous! Can't wait to add it to my resume! Gimme Patience!

1 comment:

Hilda said...

Take it from someone that isn't his mother and has very limited patience for bratty children and MUCH less for bratty teenagers - 17 is a great kid.

He's polite, he's smart, he's funny, he's handsome, he's sociable, etc.

And he clearly loves and respects his mother - yes that's right. You know damned well he listens to and considers your advice even if he doesn't folow it - but do you want a momma's boy? A "niƱo gotico" that's going to do everthing mommy says because mommy says so? Even if you're right?

No - you don't.

So contiue as you have been doing, obviously it's working.